Who says “I love you” first? Studies show whether they are men or women

You break it.

A study published in the SAGE Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that men in heterosexual relationships tend to say “I love you” first.

The researchers had 3,109 adults (over 70% women and 85% heterosexual) from Australia, Brazil, Chile, Colombia, France, Poland and the United Kingdom complete several online questionnaires about their relationships.

Contrary to stereotypical gender norms, the global research team found that in six of the seven regions (all except France), men are more likely to admit love first.

On average, men started thinking about admitting their love 69 days into a relationship, while women took 77 days to think about it.

Loving young couple sitting together outside on a few steps on their patio at home
A study published in the SAGE Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that men in heterosexual relationships tend to say “I love you” first.
Getty Images

Although lovers may have felt it for a while, “I love you” was typically said after 107 days for men and 122 days for women.

Not surprisingly, although attachment styles influenced their responses, most participants felt happy when they heard their partner say those three little words.

People with an “avoidant” attachment style (those who are highly independent both physically and emotionally and seek distance in relationships) were less enthusiastic when told “I love you,” while those with an “anxious” attachment style (those who who … are concerned with their partner’s ability to react) were significantly more satisfied.

Young couple enjoying a romantic moment together while sitting on the sandy beach at sunset
Most participants felt happy when they heard their partner confess their love, although attachment styles slightly influenced reactions.
Getty Images/iStockphoto

previous research found that men in the US are more likely to confess their love first.

An emotional connection is obviously an essential part of any romantic relationship — and new research shows it’s a key element of “good sex,” too.

A stunning study published in Sexuality & Culture magazine in May found that the three factors that contribute to someone considering a sexual encounter “great” are orgasm, emotional connection, and chemistry.

Couple in NYC
An emotional connection has been found to be one of the key factors in “good sex.”
Getty Images

Although difficult to define, an emotional connection was the second most important factor in exceptional sex.

Many participants in the study certainly made it clear that an emotional connection can exist without romantic love, but eight participants explicitly equated an emotional component with love.

In contrast, 16 participants did not require an emotional connection for excellent sex.

However, the researchers found that gender differences were evident in these opinions, with some women prioritizing emotional connection over physical satisfaction.

Caroline Bleakley

Caroline Bleakley is a USTimeToday U.S. News Reporter based in London. His focus is on U.S. politics and the environment. He has covered climate change extensively, as well as healthcare and crime. Caroline Bleakley joined USTimeToday in 2022 from the Daily Express and previously worked for Chemist and Druggist and the Jewish Chronicle. He is a graduate of Cambridge University. Languages: English. You can get in touch with Caroline Bleakley by emailing carolinebleakley@ustimetoday.com.

Related Articles

Back to top button