You enter the friend zone
new show “Platonic.” It’s a platonic friendship about a friendly relationship. Rose Byrne and Seth Rogen are executive producers. Stars too.
Rose: “It’s a male/female buddy comedy about my character’s platonic relationship with Seth Rogen. We’re Will and Sylvia, both going through a midlife crisis at the same time. My character grew up too fast, his character didn’t grow up at all.”
Complementing Platonic, it will premiere on Apple TV+ on May 24th.
There is nothing better than a lady. Helen Mirren stars in the souped-up film Fast X, set in Rome, where it premiered. Mirren: “Being half-Italian myself in my dreams was great. respect for women. The spirit, the guts, the energy, everything women have. Very few filmmakers have that. Better now than years ago, but many filmmakers still cannot see us as equals.”
There was enough money for Charlize Theron, Brie Larson and Rita Moreno. The film reportedly cost $350 million. In euros, that’s the price of Queen Camilla’s knickers. Opens on Friday.
Grab and go
BEACH Cafe. The tans come, but the customers go back. The DOJ grabs them one by one. This week George the Skunk Santos. They recently settled on Roger Stone and Rudy G. Owner Dave Goodside: “Why not just drive a dump truck through my windshield?!”
It would be better if he had a big empty table ready for a bunch of Biden bastards.
Spill the Liber tea
First class Matthew Housch. The Statue of Liberty Archivist:
“I used to be an English history teacher in college, now I keep an eye on the statue. The background is that France gave it to our 100th birthday. From one republic to another, but 10 years too late. In October 1886 she was finally here.
“It’s green because it’s copper. Air and moisture are superimposed as a patina. The French naval ship Isère collected the copper. France then built this goddess of liberty twice and shipped its parts across the Atlantic in the hold of a ship. It was rebuilt in New York.
“She carries the light and holds a flashlight in her raised right arm. The left hand holds a Tablet of the Law symbolized by the Declaration of Independence. One problem is that she can be struck by lightning. And gold leaf around the torch causes corrosion. And water leaked from the nose. They had to cut two small holes in her nose.”
Miss Liberty had a nose job like me?!
“Listen, it takes months to clean them. Clean the handrails, steps and windows that people look out of in the crown area.”
Are you using glasses?
“NO. A pressure washer. Walk. You visit. It has over 4 million visitors a year.”
Forget she had a nose job.
SLIDE Camelot. Jackie O’s summer home in East Hampton is Costalot. On the market for $55 million.
Looking for a bargain? Please. Instead, try a Hunter’s Delaware ATM.
JUNE tune: “Oh my darling. . . Oh my dear. . . Oh my darling, Calvin Klein. You are mine and mine forever because your name is on my butt.”
Not just in New York, kids, not just in New York.