A FIRST TIME dad was devastated when his wife banned him from the delivery room during labor, but his dramatic reaction has polarized his family and the internet.
The new dad posted on Reddit for a verdict on whose behavior was worse: his or his wife’s.
the man, 28, called that his wife, 29, had a “fairly normal pregnancy”.
“I’ve done my best to take care of things and make things easy for her,” the husband wrote.
“I took her to the hospital for her due date and her sister and mother picked us up from there.”
When the new mother was brought into the delivery room, things went wrong, the man explained.
She asked her mother and sister to come into the delivery room with her and that her husband would not be allowed in until she “had given birth and calmed down.”
The man was “shocked” but said he “didn’t want to make a scene”.
“We hadn’t really discussed the plan for the hospital, and I had no reason to think I wouldn’t be there when my son was born,” he added.
The man stayed in the waiting room and texted his sister-in-law to try to get more information about his wife’s point of view.
“After a while she texted back that my wife ‘just doesn’t want you to see her that way,’ and then added that she didn’t agree with my wife and was trying to convince her, but ultimately it was her choice and I should do respect it,” he said.
After waiting six hours, the man made up his mind and left the hospital.
“I decided there was no point, so I texted her sister that I was going home. I would meet my son when they take him home and take care of the birth certificate the next day,” he said.
Nine hours later, the man was able to meet his new son – and had a heated argument with his angry wife.
“I told her we can talk about it in a few days because she just gave birth,” he said.
“She didn’t want to drop the subject so I finally told her she barred me from having my son for no reason, I see no need to hang around in a hospital waiting room for hours doing nothing, and that even her own.” Sister thinks what she did was wrong.
“She said there could have been complications and I needed to be there, to which I replied I wouldn’t have been there because she would have kept me out of the room and the doctors would have taken care of any problems anyway.”
Still upset, the new dad asked for the commenters’ opinion on the scenario.
“Her sister told me to just apologize and get over it because it has been a stressful time for my wife, but I feel I owe a bigger apology first for how I was left out of the birth of my own son,” wrote he.
Redditors’ “official” decision was the rare “everyone sucks here,” reserved for circumstances where all parties are at fault.
“The lack of a clear plan has been the problem from the start,” wrote one commenter.
“Think this is a situation where you can talk about why there was a misunderstanding on both sides and then figure out how to avoid a repeat in the future.”
Other commenters pointed out that it wasn’t fair for the new mother to wait until she reached the hospital before telling her husband about the plan.
“She practically slammed the door in your face expecting you’d just waited 15 hours in the uncomfortable waiting room,” one wrote.
“Days or two,” wrote another Reddit user. “I was going through seven or eight shifts of nurses when I delivered my first.”
Most commenters could see both sides.
“On the one hand: the delivery room is your wife’s domain and she can decide without judgment who watches a child come out of her,” wrote one.
But on the other hand, “she excluded you from a once-in-a-lifetime experience with your child WITHOUT prior discussion,” they added.
Delivery room drama is not uncommon on Reddit: another new mom asked if her mother-in-law was stepping out of line by insisting on being in the delivery room.
Meanwhile, midwives shared the biggest “red” baby names they’ve come across, including one that “sounds like medication.”
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https://www.thesun.co.uk/fabulous/17850576/wife-delivery-room-husband-payback-baby-birth/ My wife wouldn’t let me into the delivery room to see my own son born – I got revenge but now she hardly ever talks to me