Halsey has spoken openly about “a deep sadness” she feels inside and has apologized to fans for “encroaching” on her art.
Ahead of the 27-year-old pop singer’s birthday on September 29, she thought deeply about her life and career.
In a Sept. 21 Instagram story, Halsey, who uses she/she pronouns, wrote: “I find there is a deep sadness within me that no measure of worldly pleasure can touch, a loneliness, an emptiness.
“I often wonder if I chose the wrong life for myself,” the “Without Me” singer continued. “And the weight is stifling. I am sorry that melancholy permeated my art in a way that served no greater purpose than my own self-loathing.”
She added that she’s approaching her 28th birthday and “right now, for the first time since I took a single breath in this new life at 18, I’m exhaling and catching my breath.”
“I wander lawless and hope to find my way somewhere meaningful soon so I can give you the courage I’ve always known to shovel heaps of it into your ears,” she concluded. “They’ve been shrinking lately. If you can’t be kind, at least be gentle. With love.”
Halsey has been vocal about her struggles with mental health. She was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in high school. During a 2019 interview with Rolling Stone, The Grammy winner has been open about getting professional help.
“I’ve been signed twice since then [I became] Halsey, and nobody knows about it. But I’m not ashamed to talk about it now,” she said.
“It was my choice. I said it [my manager]’Hey, I’m not going to do anything bad right now, but I get to the point where I’m scared I might do it, so I have to find out.'”
In July 2021, Halsey welcomed her first child, son Ender, with boyfriend Alev Aydin. Earlier this year, she revealed the numerous health issues she’s had since giving birth.
If you are experiencing or struggling with feelings of need and isolation, the Samaritans offer support; You can speak to someone free of charge and confidentially on 116 123 (UK and ROI), email email@example.com or visit the Samaritans website for details of your nearest branch.
If you are a US resident and you or someone you know needs mental health help right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). The Helpline is a free, confidential crisis hotline available to everyone 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
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https://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/music/news/halsey-apologises-fans-music-b2173930.html Halsey Apologizes To Fans For ‘Self-Hate’ Music: ‘I’m Sorry The Melancholy Seeped Into My Art’