Celebs Go Dating is just as brutal and brutal as a Victorian freak show – so why is it still on TV?

YYou may wonder why? Celebrities going on dates have enjoyed a long and happy relationship with Channel No. 4 and viewers. It’s been out since 2016 and is on its 10th series, which is certainly an achievement, although not necessarily helping in the case of Channel 4 as it is an essential component of the development infrastructure. our public service wave. I’m not sure Nadine Dorries would consider it enough as “Brother”. Then again, it’s pretty gentle, like her.

I suppose the explanation for the relative success of CGD Pretty simple: it’s a matter of supply and demand. Wannabe celebrities won’t be active at all, because the supply is too big right now; and active TV audiences want to see other human beings lose whatever dignity they still possess, in another incarnation of the Victorian freak show. In case Celebrities going on dates, the presenter pretends to help celebrities find love. In fact, if you forgive the expression, famous people often find disclaimer.

For all that is supposed to be the wake of life in the 2020s, and all the glitzy gadgets and posh restaurants the victims are treated to, CGD feels like an exercise in age-old voyeurism and masochism. It looks like Oldest brother but with appetizers, cocktails and a bunch of grotesque treats. Had he been born later, I can’t help but feel that today’s John Merrick would be the king of reality shows and the console game circuit. He may even have his own talk show at the moment. Anyway, CGD brings together another selection of mostly famous people – people who make careers for a modest fee to play around, or a distorted version of themselves, physically and affection. There are a lot of them out there, too. I think there are more people doing this in the UK right now than in the manufacturing industry.

Another feature of contemporary reality shows is the extreme youth of the contestants, to the point where they have no time to do anything but appear on reality TV shows. In that sense, they are professionals, but have a tendency to abuse children. Above CGD we found Chloe Brockett (20) among TOWIENikita Jasmine (27) of Married at first sightMarty McKenna (27 years old), for example:shore of Geordie and a Sid the Sexist apprentice, Miles Nazaire (25), first seen in Made in Chelseaand apple-cheeked lover Ryan-Mark Parsons, (21 years old) refused Probationer.

The weirdest friend is Abz Love, a 43-year-old former pop star with random tattoos (he’s already 5 years old) who plays with his food like he’s three. Celebrities are partnered with strangers perhaps looking for their own 15 minutes of fame – such as Chelsea girl Chloe, who owns a hot dog named Rupert, or Georgia, legal counsel from Doncaster – whom neither the celebrities nor we will ever see again (unless they appear on another reality show, naturally). As if self-immolation in front of the camera wasn’t enough for the stars, exaggerated comedian Rob Beckett delivered an outrageous commentary. In one episode, I counted eight “pubs” (words referring to non-hairs), three “chests” (words referring to not actual stupid celebrities), a few “cocks” (again, the word refers to no CGD candidate) and a “vagina”.

Ulrika Jonsson is the exception as the oldest (54 years old) and biggest star on the show, but this only means she has to fall further behind. The kids had absolutely no idea who she was, an interesting reflection on her popularity. She mentioned her role on Fighter for Marty and it sparked some recognition: “Didn’t you shake one of them off?”

They edited her with a couple of people her age, filmed and watched by the hosts/judges, and the dates went smoothly. Then came a “feedback” session with the boys plus the rest of the cast, something Ulrika didn’t expect to suffer. She has to stand there while these old friends/future suitors act rude to her. Far from “reality”, such things do not happen in real life, at least not in such theatrical form.

At the other end of the age, Ryan-Mark Parson, who was supposed to be at school, dates a hilarious Welsh crush in his age group named Dan, who only gives him two out of 10 Likes. Kim Jong-Un, whose fashion sense he shares, Ryan-Mark retaliates with nuclear force – throwing two out of 10 Dan’s way basically because he’s “ugly”. One of the hosts calls Mark-Ryan, advising him that he gets nowhere by doing such things, ignoring the fact that Ryan-Mark intends to make a living doing it.

The “reality star” is like a concept that has been around forever, but it only really appeared in 2000, with the UK appearance of Oldest brother, which some of us saw with the same horror as we later experienced the first reported Covid case. It’s a very 21st-century thing, and like any virus, programs eat themselves up exponentially, and so now they’re an endemic to national life.

I suppose the only thing that one can do during a pandemic of the reality star is to take the necessary precautions and, if you are near it, take advantage of it, by trying to detect it. reveal rare talents who will mutate from a mere reality star into a real one. Of all the ludicrous fantasies and mediocrity surrounding the celebrity dating agency, it’s the “dating coordinator,” an actor named Tom Read Wilson, who mixes common personalities. by Kenneth Williams with Freddie Mercury’s teeth. He’s 35, and it’s time for him to date his destiny.